The University of Louisville, Kentucky conducted research that showed a trend among women they called, mate copying, which states that women are more attracted to a man when their peers show approval and/or attraction.Another showed 90% of single women polled were interested in a man who they believed was taken, while only 59% wanted him when told he was single.When I was 18 I dated a man (significantly) older than me, married of course.
On the surface, it seems like EVERYTHING in my relationship is going my way. She has already told me that when she thinks about the future, she is thinking about me/us and not him. And we are making all the necessary life changes to be ready for our life together. After a couple of months of her living alone, I began staying over more and more. He is finally in a new relationship, too, so that may help everyone involved move forward. My lady and I get to be with the love of our lives. My hope is that it helps open eyes on any side of the equation. you’ll remember something I’ve shared here and have a slightly different perspective.
She has told me that she knows her real happiness can only be achieved with me. She knows her family (and his) will be devastated and very disappointed in her. A few weeks after this story was posted, we took a trip out of town for a week together. They haven’t completely come around but they are making motions in that direction. We have discussed our intention to marry, but we haven’t firmed up any plans. She has struggled with guilt over how things transpired.
She accepts that her marriage is nothing more than a good friendship and always has been. She acknowledges that she’s lived a majority of her life trying to make other people happy and “do the right thing” and never put her own happiness first. The day we came back home, she told her husband about us and asked him to move to his parents’ house. As expected, she got little support or understanding. They finally admitted that they knew the marriage was in trouble for years despite the calm appearance.
I think this is because sexual-monogamy (fidelity) is not the natural way for humans like we've been let to believe, by our cultures and by biased scientists, but I digress.
Since one can only truly speak for themselves, here's my personal experience.